[Originally written and suggested by @Coral, continued by Dora_Serge, and then CocoPop picked up the thread. Mars and now Lokus took over, then Daria, and now CocoPop.]
How about writing a story together? We've already read a few books together. Writing a whole story takes time and ideas don't grow on trees. I’ll start, and you just have to copy/paste what is written into a new post so that you can continue the story as you wish. You can write a paragraph, a line, or just a sentence and then publish it so that anyone else can pick up the story where you left off. You can also add some drawing to illustrate it! I'm sure this is going to be fun. And, of course, native English speakers are more than welcome to participate. Come on, let’s do it! It’ll be our lovely Frankenstory.
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Coral:♈he year is 2087. Humanity has survived climate change, but has learned its lesson. Borders are history and large areas of land have been devoured by seas and oceans. However, drinkable water is so scarce that on the black market they call it "the liquid diamond".
Dora_Serge: ♏arwin closed his laptop with a loud crash and stretched out. The story sucks. Poor start. Why on Earth has he become a writer? Why not a software engineer as his mom insisted? He checked the time. 7:45 am. He glanced outside. The blazing sun blinded him. Too hot for the 26th of April. Maybe a disaster story about climate change and all that stuff isn't a bad idea... However.. Let's take a morning swim first. Happily, we still have enough fresh water to fill in the swimming pool. Where the hell are my swimming trunks?
CocoPop: "♈️runks? Who needs them?! Besides, who's gonna see me in the privacy of my own back yard with all these hedges. And if they do somehow manage to get an eyeful, what's the harm? What am I, Medusa? What's the point of all this diet and exercise if the sight of me in my birthday suit sends people into tizzies?" Stealthily and silently, Marvin dragged the hose to the pool, then turned the water on just enough to top it off without making too much noise. God forbid the AquaPol should hear it and fine him again. As he stood there akimbo, in all his naked glory, a gleam caught his eye. Looking up beyond the tall hedges that surrounded his pool area, he saw what looked like a man hanging off a trellis across the street, and the gleam seemed to be coming from a pair of binoculars pressed to his face with his free hand...
Mars: ♏arvin couldn't believe it. Someone was actually spying on him when he tried to enjoy his morning swim! He shook his head, feeling harassed, but a bit amused. "What's wrong with people these days? Don't they have anything better to do?" He muttered as he covered himself with a towel. Then, he tried to go through all the potential suspects in his mind. Was it the nosy neighbor with loud music and the dog that won't stop barking? Or the eccentric old lady down the street who always wore a raincoat and sunglasses, even on the hottest day? Marvin snapped out of his daydream, feeling like he was in a bad spy movie.
Lokus: ♓️e remembered when he crossed paths with the new neighbor from across the street, the other day. He wasn't sure if he would recognize him again, so inconspicuous a man he was. Did he have a short grey beard? Was it blond? Was he in his fifties? Late forties? Early sixties? Difficult to tell. But the encounter left Marwin insecure and a little uneasy, as the neighbor hadn't answered his greeting. Was he a foreigner?
The recollection dissuaded him from the swim. 'I could also take a swim later', he said to himself, 'The guy will eventually tire and go away'. He was sure now it was the new neighbor. What a weirdo. Or was he from the AquaPol? Have they started employing deep-cover spies?
He returned to his laptop, leaving wet footprints on the way back to his desk. 'The liquid diamond': he had to make the most out of this metaphor, it could even work for the title.
When his next sentence took a perfect shape in his mind and he was about to type it, the buzz of his telephone made him jump in his seat. Ron Roberts, his literary agent, called again at the worst possible moment. He'd be happy to throw the phone out the window, but he couldn't afford not to answer.
– Marwin, how’s it going? - Ron's voice was soft and charming, which could only mean trouble. - I was thinking of you, dear boy. I even had a dream about you, can you believe that? How's my story? The deadline is in six weeks, so I suppose you're concluding. You know I count on you, don't you?
Dora_Serge:
"♑úmero incorrecto", Marwin answered in Spanish and added in German just for sure: "Falsche Nummer, ich kenne keinen Marwin". Then, he slammed the phone down. Ron won't get the hump, he was used to such short talks.
Six weeks..In six weeks he has to be ready with his story and with his divorce. He hated his wife, who like an immense octopus stifled him with her tentacles. Tentacles did have their names: mediocrtity, high ambitions and lack of imagination. Boring was she. Dull as ditchwater. Water..water...swimming pool..A sudden thought came up to his mind: What if...."
♒️hat if… Yes! I’ll put my desk in the shallow part of the pool and if the AquaPol tries anything, I’ll claim it’s my work space; I can only get inspired to write if I’m halfway immersed in water! Then this book isn’t the only thing I’ll write — I'll even be able to write my water bill and pool maintenance costs off come tax time. Why didn’t I think of this before?! At that moment, from behind him came the familiar, whiny, creaky, shrill voice that always made the blood freeze in his veins… “What do you think you’re doing, Marvin? And who the hell are you talking to??!! Isn't it a bit early to be hitting the sauce?!"
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▶to be continued by another journaler
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Hahaha "to hit the sauce" is going to be my favorite expression 😆
🤣
👋👋👋I'm so going to throw my octopus. I mean it. hahaha. What's with this obsession with the pool?😆
@Lokus, hahahaha, that's a good one, and you can also hit the bottle.
And next, the hay. 😉
Yep!)))
Hi Uly, what's the correct word in this post to replace "diplomat"? https://journaly.com/post/30030
@CocoPop I notice that you prefer to have journalers use contractions with verbs: e.g. "I won't" instead of "I will not". Both are correct, of course. In speech, contractions are customary; but in writing is it always necessary to use contractions? Or is it a preference? Just trying to understand and learn.
Hi @chazy ! Most of these posts are written as if the person were speaking, telling a story, talking about themselves, etc. and none of them are academic papers. That being the case, the writing should reflect how they would actually speak if they were relating this in person. Full forms tends to sound official and robotic, and that's why they're only really "expected" in dissertations and academic writing. The Chicago Manual of Style says “Most types of writing benefit from the use of contractions. If used thoughtfully, contractions in prose sound natural and relaxed and make reading more enjoyable.” Aside from that, I'm also encouraging posters to use them in their writing so that they'll hopefully use them in speech as well. Nothing sounds more robotic and stiff than full forms. You can read more here: https://proofreadingpal.com/proofreading-pulse/writing-guides/when-should-i-use-contractions/
@CocoPop Thanks. I understand the logic now. By the way, I also had a teacher who preached against contractions.
@chazy That's such a disservice to people learning English. I could see a teacher having her English-speaking students not use them for the sake of some outdated formality. But to lead foreign students of English to believe that they'll somehow sound disrespectful or uneducated if they use them is appalling. They walk around like little robots talking about I am or you can not etc. which deprives them of the natural and accepted rhythm of spoken English. That's why — even thought it's not a correction per se — I always suggest them, so they can get used to the concept of using them in both the written and the spoken language.