Thinking in English as a Medicine
English

Thinking in English as a Medicine

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Sometimes it's difficult for me, to find my way out of the loop of negative thoughts, but several weeks ago I realized that I have a helpful tool at hand. I am speaking about thinking in foreign languages. I don't know why, but particularly thinking in English makes me feel stronger and more confident. Maybe, it is because I've learned English almost on my own. By saying "almost on my own" I mean that I already had basic knowledge of English, that was me taught, but I couldn't express myself in English. I remember me lying on my bed, feeling depressed and thinking that I never will be able to learn English on my own. Of course, my depression was partially responsible for this distorted attitude towards learning English. I remember that the fact that I couldn't have even a self-talk in English, made me feel terrible, because being fluent in English was one of my biggest dreams, and it is still my big dream. I can't consider myself totally fluent, but now I can write an entry without the need to look up words in the dictionary and I can have self-talks in English. Even though I still make mistakes and my English is far from being perfect, I still consider my improvement as an accomplishment. It feels like a dream came true, even though there is a lot of work ahead of me in order to reach the level of English that I want to have. Along with that feeling of accomplishment, I use English as a tool that helps me combat negative thoughts and boost my confidence. For example, I have encouraging self-talks in English while I am running. Before I started thinking in English during running, I was stuck in this loop of negative thoughts even though I was running. Now, English has become the language that makes me feel better during my running sessions. I run and have encouraging self-talk in English that helps me feel more confident and stronger during and after my running sessions. I think, that English has become not only my passion, but also my medicine.

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