Morning light poured through the window, bathing the kitchen in a golden glow. Dust motes danced in the air, and the warmth of the sun wrapped around me like a soft blanket. I stood at the counter, carefully measuring a tablespoon of porridge into my bowl, the familiar routine bringing a sense of comfort. But then, a strange trembling broke the tranquility, a subtle vibration that sent a shiver down my spine.
I paused, spoon hovering mid-air, my brow furrowing in confusion. The plastic windows were locked tight, their soundproofing usually effective at keeping the outside world at bay. What was that noise? Odd, I thought, frowning as I set the spoon down with a soft clink.
I leaned in, straining to listen. The sound seemed to pulse from a shadowy corner of the kitchen, near the sink. Was that water flowing through the pipes? I stepped closer, my heart quickening, but the pipes remained unnervingly silent, their usual gurgle absent.
Curiosity piqued, I wandered into the bathroom. The sound grew louder here, wrapping around me like an unseen presence. The walls seemed to vibrate, resonating with a melody that felt almost alive. I stood still, entranced, as the haunting notes played on for about a minute, filling the air with an eerie beauty.
And then, just as suddenly as it had begun, silence enveloped the room, swallowing the sound whole. With a heavy sigh, I turned back towards the kitchen, the porridge now cold and forgotten in its bowl, the lingering mystery still tugging at the edges of my thoughts, refusing to let go.
For variety, I suggest that you revise some sentences so that they do not all have participial phrases. I think when they're overused, your writing may begin to feel monotonous or overly stylized, for instance, The sound grew louder here, wrapping around me like an unseen presence. The walls seemed to vibrate, resonating with a melody that felt almost alive. I stood still, entranced, as the haunting notes played on for about a minute, filling the air with an eerie beauty).
What if just to delete the last part of the last sentence in the second paragraph?
I don't think you need to eliminate the last sentence. Just incorporate it differently. Some examples:
Drawn by curiosity, I wandered into the bathroom. The noise grew louder and enveloped me in a strange, mesmerizing way. A faint vibration running through the walls carried a melody that felt unsettlingly alive. I stood captivated for what felt like a minute as the haunting sound filled the air with an eerie beauty.
With my curiosity piqued, I wandered into the bathroom. The sound grew louder here and wrapped around me like an invisible presence. A faint vibration ran through the walls as if they were alive with a strange melody. I stood frozen, captivated by the haunting notes that cast an eerie beauty over everything.
These are suggestions only. Do these two rewrites change what you want to express?