Today, my friend and I walked past a foreign language university. I said, "Maybe I should get a degree in foreign languages." He replied, "Maybe you should. But you were thinking about doing that a year ago, weren't you?"

As a kid, I used to spend more time on my computer than interacting with people. I played video games a lot, but I also learned programming as a hobby. Naturally, being the introvert that I am, I thought it'd be a good idea to pursue computer science as a career. I figured I wouldn't have to interact with people that much. Boy, was I wrong... When I was still in school, I got my first and only job as a Python programmer. And even though I didn't have to interact with customers, I still had to work with coworkers, report to my boss, etc.

Human interactions aside, that job had its pros and cons. The upside was that it paid really well, and the office had a cafeteria so good that the food there was tastier than in some restaurants! The downside was everything else. I was alternating between barely tolerating this job and straight-up hating it. I hated what I was working on. I hated half of my coworkers. I don't even want to think about all those useless meetings we had. I could get a phone call at 3 am, 5 am or 7 am because there was an incident that only I could resolve. I hated my boss. I was miserable. At a certain point, a bunch of people left, and the workload for everyone else increased significantly. Even before that, we were understaffed. Even though my salary almost doubled, I thought that at that point, money didn't even mean anything to me anymore. I worked there for six years, and at the end of it, I got to the point where I was like this is it! Either I hang myself or I quit this job on the spot. If you're reading this, you've probably guessed that I went with the second option.

I remember times when I lived with a cousin of mine for a year — when I was in college, before university. She was working as an accountant and a few times, she talked about taking a vacation. In Russian, if you translate it literally, we say "I want to take a rest." I always joked, "Why would you want to take a rest? All you're doing is sitting at a computer! How are you tired?" This is my karma, I guess — to feel mental exhaustion in every sense of the word.

I didn't have a plan or anything. I didn't even want to look at positions in other companies. I haven't sent out any resumes. I thought I'd just rest for now. I had some savings that allow me that luxury. And my friends and relatives were very supportive at first, but some months later, they started expressing their concern. "The longer you're out of the workforce, the harder it's going to be to get back," they said. And I was like, "Yeah, whatever." When I said anything about my hobbies, they'd say, "Why don't you do it for money? Don't you want to pursue it as a career?" They've said that about photography, language learning, musical instruments... And I didn't even want to entertain that thought. I loved programming once, and this job murdered all my love in cold blood. I wouldn't want to lose my passion for any of my hobbies.

Now that two years have passed, I'm starting to feel like my burnout is finally losing its grip. I feel like I can enjoy living my life again. And I also feel my wallet getting thinner, as I've burned through two thirds of my life savings. Now I'm thinking about my career. Should I start looking for a job as a programmer again? It feels stupid to throw away six years of experience, considering the fact that I only ever worked for one company — it shouldn't be that bad at every other company, right? But I'm also thinking about changing careers. Maybe I should get a degree in languages, but I'm not sure what I'd do with it. It's also scary to change careers in your 30s.

I actually looked at universities that offer degrees in languages a year ago. My understanding is that they usually teach English as the first foreign language, and you can choose the second language. The problem is, I'd like to learn Japanese, and it's uncommon. For example, the university in my city only offers Chinese, German, Spanish, and Italian. I couldn't decide between them, so I didn't register. I've wasted another year doing nothing, but now, I feel motivated to start learning something new. I'd also learn more about my native Russian there.

I even thought about combining my love for languages with my experience in programming. I thought about creating a language learning game, maybe something similar to Shashingo, which I talked about in a previous post. My game would be about learning the Russian language, though. But I don't think it makes much sense. I don't believe that gamification in language learning is a very effective tool. Proper study will always be more effective than some luodingo. And the audience for this game would probably be way too small. There's also the job of a technical writer. A knowledge of languages would be helpful there, as would programming experience if it's a job in an IT company. I don't know what I think about that, though.

Anyway, I'll probably start by visiting the university in my city and asking what courses they offer and what I need to do to register. I'll look into other universities too.