Many of you won't believe this, but what I fear the most in my life is a creature that is a symbol of innocence, freedom and joy.

As you might know, what distinguishes a phobia from the other common fears is its inconsistency.

It's not clear what triggers these irrational fears, maybe a traumatic past event that our brain has linked together with any object, animal or situation present in that particular moment.(Maybe we can't even remember it).

What is certain is that this specific stimulus holds an intense and deep anxiety.

After all, it's not the only case in which our brains are deceived by our perceptions and make us feel anxious without a real incoming danger. Sometimes stress works the same way.

Sometimes a phobia can be paralyzing, keeping us from doing important things or having relaxed moments in our daily lives. A classic example is the business man who is afraid of flying.

Sometimes this happens to me, particularly in the summertime; If you haven't got it yet: yes, it's true, I'm afraid of butterflies!!!

When I was younger, I used to fear every flying insect except flies and mosquitoes, now I can tolerate stink bugs and dragonflies, I still fear grasshoppers, but my real blind spot is butterflies and moths, because of their velvety wings, colours and geometric patterns. Also because they are unpredictable, they fly without a set trajectory, they can suddenly be on you.

The more "beautiful" or vividly coloured or dark they are, the more I'm scared; actually I can barely tolerate the white ones. And their size does matter!

The only flying insects I've never been scared of are bees, even if I was stung by them.

If I come across one of them (butterflies/moths) outdoors, and maybe it's not so close to me, my heart rate will increase and I'll run away, but nothing very dramatic. It would be different if one of them somehow entered my house or other indoor places while I'm in there! Actually sometimes it's happened, despite having insect screens; fortunately I wasn't alone in the house and someone helped me.

I'm terrified of being alone in a closed space with one or more of them. I can't even immagine that! I start shivering just thinking about.

Since I was born, I've lived in a village, it's not far from the city but it's in the countryside; to be honest when I was a child I was more likely to come across one of them, but now, due to the air pollution or other factors, the population of these insects is halved. It's quite sad, thinking about the environment and from the biodiversity point of view, but, I must admit, I feel safer.

As for the origin of my fear, I have some memories: I remember an episode of me as a child fighting with my mother while a moth was flying above our heads and I remember another episode in which a peer of mine was holding a moth (or a butterfly) in her hands and then threw the insect at me.

Anyway, reading some forums on the Internet, I learned I'm not the only one scared of these innocent creatures, actually there are plenty of stories of people as terrified as me.

I also found some videos about some people who succeeded in overcoming this fear...it seems incredible to me.

But nothing is impossible...If one day I decided to face this problem, I'd need an intense desensitization and psycological help.