On Friday morning, after having my morning coffee, I went to the kitchen to start cleaning. There, I was confronted with a scene of piled-up dishes and scattered mess, which immediately caused me intense stress. By nature, I am someone who cannot tolerate disorder at home. For me, organization is not a luxury, but a necessity that gives me a sense of safety and comfort.When chaos takes over, an inner anxiety grips me and can escalate quickly. Sometimes, I find myself asking everyone to step away so I can restore order in peace. This reaction occurs whenever a family member creates disorder in any part of the house, and I have noticed that it has become more intense since 2024.I have become extremely sensitive to any mess or disturbance in a space I have just cleaned, even if it is caused by a small child. Although I do not yell at children or blame them directly, the tension I feel is deep and emotionally exhausting. In those moments, the idea of living alone in my own home crosses my mind—a place where the order I create remains untouched and my efforts are not undone.Over time, I have started to feel that this issue is taking a toll on my mental well-being, and that living with others has become increasingly difficult for me. I have seriously begun considering the option of living independently, even from a financial perspective, despite my family’s opposition. Caught between my desire for mental peace and my fear that isolation might worsen my state, I find myself stuck in an inner conflict I can no longer ignore