December 7th 2021

Today, I'm very anxious about several things. My first artistic gymnastics competition as a coach is coming up soon (more precisely, this saturyday). Because it's my debut, I want everything to go as I planned but I cannot slow down even when I get home. I know that it's normal for things to get out of hand sometimes, so I'm trying to not be too hard on myself. I guess I need to have everything under my control to feel well and this feature was boosted by becoming a coach. Anyway, I recognize that I need to work on this in order to get a handle on my anxiety crisis, but not now.

Besides that, I'm going on vacation with my girlfriend in two weeks and she'll finally meet my parents. Again, the same feeling of wanting everything to go perfectly hits me. It's not about believing that she's not good enough to meet my family or vice-versa. It's because there's always some situation that happens that I feel embarrassed. Like last vacation that my dad had an arguing with my sister and everybody got so unconfortable after that. I can deal with it and I'm fine, but I think I just wouldn't know how to act if she was there with me.